The art of effective communication is often the difference between smooth interactions with your prospects and losing them in the process. There's a subtle yet powerful force at play in our interactions – the stories we create in our minds. These stories, which are essentially assumptions, shape our perceptions and can either enhance or hinder our sales conversations.

Imagine your mind as a storyteller, constantly crafting narratives to make sense of the world. These narratives are your interpretations, your assumptions about what people say and do. When you create a story, you start viewing everything through the lens of that story, reinforcing it and shaping your subsequent actions.

For instance, if a prospect asks you “what makes you better than ABC competitor?” your mind might be tempted to create any of the following stories:
“They like our competitor more.”
“This is going to be a harder sale than I thought.”
"We haven’t even started working together and they’re already skeptical.”
“They don’t see the value in what we offer.”
"I haven’t done a good job communicating our value.”

Subconsciously, you may start framing all your interactions with this prospect around this narrative without even noticing. This limits your ability to truly connect with them and understand their needs, because you're locked into your own assumptions.

Meanwhile back in reality, your prospect is sitting in front of you asking a question out of pure curiosity and interest in knowing more about your product or service. 

Do you see how these assumptions could get in the way of your sales process if they continue to go unnoticed? Sales is a thorough process, so let’s not overcomplicate things for yourself further by letting these stories go unnoticed and run the show.

The Illusion of Reality
What's even more intriguing is that we often present these stories as our reality, our truth. We believe them so strongly that they guide our actions and responses. In the example above, you might respond to the prospect's inquiry by offering discounts to impress them or start to communicate in a less empowered way, based solely on your story.

But here's the catch – the real truth exists beyond these stories. It's not your prospect's job to fit into your narrative; it's your job to understand theirs.

Breaking Free From Assumptions
Salespeople often encounter challenges when they let assumptions and stories dictate their interactions with prospects.

When you assume you know what a prospect needs or wants, you risk missing out on valuable information. You might overlook opportunities to tailor your offering to their unique requirements.

Stories can lead to misunderstandings and misinterpretations. If you're too busy projecting your assumptions onto the prospect, you won't be fully present in the conversation, and this can create friction.

Trust is the foundation of any successful sale. If prospects feel that you're not genuinely listening to them but instead imposing your own stories, it erodes trust and can lead to lost deals.

So, how can you break free from these limiting assumptions and stories in your sales conversations?

Active Listening: Make a conscious effort to listen actively to what your prospect is saying. Ask clarifying questions and seek to understand their perspective. If you are picking up on an “ulterior transaction” as we call it in Transactional Analysis (more on that later!), call it out and get curious. If you want to know why your prospect is asking something, find the balance between responding to their inquiry and gathering necessary information to understand why that question is important to them. Don’t assume you know - ask with genuine and authentic curiosity.

Challenge Your Assumptions: Recognize when you're creating a story and question its validity. Are you making assumptions based on limited information? Keep an open mind. This all may seem easier said than done and it will take time and practice. It all started with noticing your stories first and foremost. I recommend practicing raising your awareness in your interactions with your family, friends, and coworkers; in addition to the awareness you raise in conversations with prospects.

Stay Present: When we create stories, we are ultimately allowing our past experiences to override the present moment. Focus on the here and now. Don't let your preconceived notions cloud your ability to engage with the prospect in front of you. Again, this will take time, awareness, and practice. 

Empathy: Put yourself in your prospect's shoes. Understand their challenges, goals, and motivations. This empathy will help you connect on a deeper level. The second agreement in Don Miguel Ruiz’s Four Agreements is Don’t take anything personally for good reason! 

So keep in mind that creating assumptions and stories can be silent saboteurs of your sales success. Recognizing and overcoming these narratives is the key to creating more genuine and productive sales conversations. Remember, the real truth lies outside the confines of the stories we create – it's your job as a salesperson to discover it and tailor your approach accordingly. Break free from assumptions, and watch your sales career soar to new heights.

If you have questions or want help with this concept, please book a call so we can talk more!